Nanga amacebiso amathandathu aya kukunceda ukuba uqalise uthethathethwano lwakho luqale kakuhle:

1. Zibeke ezihlangwini zakho.Ngaphambi kokuba uthethe nomnye umntu, chonga ukuba yintoni nawenaimfuno - iimfuno zakho ezinzulu kunye neenqobo ezisemgangathweni.Ukuzazi ngokwakho kunokukunceda uhlale ugxile kwiinketho ezisebenzela wonke umntu.Okukhona usazi malunga nezinto onomdla kuzo, kokukhona unokuza neendlela zokuyila ezihlangabezana neemfuno zabantu bonke.
2. Phuhlisa yangaphakathi yakho "Eyona ndlela iNgcono kwiSivumelwano esiXhathiweyo" (okanye i-BATNA).Awunakusoloko uyilawula into eyenzekayo kuwe, kodwa unokugqiba ukuba usabele njani.Owona mqobo mkhulu ekufumaneni oko sikufuna ngokwenene ebomini asiloqela elinye.Owona mqobo mkhulu sithi.Singena ngendlela yethu.Thatha imbono ekude ukukunceda wenze isigqibo ngokuzolileyo nangokucacileyo.Musa ukusabela ngokungxama.Ukuba uziva uziva uvakalelwe ngaphambili, ngexesha nasemva kwayo nayiphi na ingxaki yokuchaswa, thatha umzuzwana kwaye ujonge imeko ukude.
3. Hlaziya umfanekiso wakho.Abo balijonga ihlabathi “njengentiyo ngokusisiseko” baya kubaphatha abanye njengeentshaba.Abo bakholelwa ukuba ihlabathi linobuhlobo kunokwenzeka ngakumbi kwabanye ukuba babe ngamaqabane anokubakho.Xa uthetha-thethana, unokukhetha ukubona indawo yokusombulula ingxaki ngentsebenziswano nelinye iqela, okanye ungakhetha ukubona umlo ophumeleleyo okanye ongaphumeleliyo.Khetha ukwenza unxibelelwano lwakho lube luhle.Ukugxeka abanye kunika amandla kwaye kwenza kube nzima ukufikelela kwisigqibo sokuphumelela.Fumana iindlela zokusebenzisana namanye amaqela.
4. Hlala kwizowuni.Ukunikela ingqalelo kwizinto zangoku kufuna ukuba siyeke izinto ezidluleyo, kuquka namava angathandekiyo.Yekani ukuzikhathaza ngezinto ezadlulayo.Ingqumbo isusa ingqalelo yakho kwizinto ezibalulekileyo.Ixesha elidlulileyo lidlule.Ukuqhubela phambili kunomdla kumntu wonke.
5. Bonisa intlonipho nokuba awuphathwanga ngayo.Ukuba umchasi wakho usebenzisa amazwi arhabaxa, zama ukuhlala upholile kwaye unembeko, unomonde kwaye uzingise.Qwalasela le meko kwaye uchonge eyona nto uyifuna ngokwenene nendlela onokuzibamba ngayo ukwanelisa iimfuno zakho.
6. Khangela inzuzo efanayo.Xa wena kunye namaqabane akho othethathethwano nifuna iimeko “zokuphumelela”, uyasuka “ekuthatheni uye ekupheni.”Ukuthatha kuthetha ukugxila kuphela kwiimfuno zakho.Xa unikela, udala ixabiso kwabanye.Ukupha akuthethi ukulahlekelwa.

 

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